20 thinks I learnt about me when I took the time to get real!

This is me! All natural ! Hair not done. No make up! Raw and real. Sometimes we get so busy that we loose connection with our spirit and our authentic self. As most of you know. I took the time to reconnect the last couple of months and I wanted to share what I learnt about myself by stopping and paying attention and seeking the right help guided by my intuition. 

1. Food impacts my mood and I mean greatly! When I eat real food, my energy is higher, my moods are uplifted . If I eat dead processed foods my moods are low. 

2. I experience anger and frustration when I am not taking care of myself and when I am not doing things I enjoy. 

3. I have learnt a lesson in duality and for every moment we experience, there are emotions of the polar opposite at play . Happiness, sadness. Shame and pride . Loss and gain to name a few.  

4 My anger / guilt are not me but just and expression of me when I'm not on purpose and flowing with my highest values. 

5. My life experiences will assist me in serving others . 

6. I contributed to the frustrations in my life because I had no boundaries.  

7. Sleep is crucial for me and I need to go to bed at a reasonable hour. 

8. When I am feeling forced to do something I don't want to do I get angry. Must stop doing it. 

9. I have an important gift and message to share just as we all do and it is of worth and value. 

10. Moving my body daily in ways that I love is important to allow energy to flow. It's important that I love how I move. 

11. When I'm working with energy I must ground myself before driving. Learnt that one the hard way 😁 

12. Anxiety is really just a baramoter to tell me that I am off track .

13. Don't make big decisions when you are not feeling whole . 

14. The concept that there is nothing to forgive is something I'm trying to get my head around and still work in progress . If everything serves a purpose to assist me in achieving  my highest values then there is really truly nothing to forgive . Like I said still working on this  one. 

15. Authenticity and vulnerability are beautiful and nothing to hide.

16. Stress is s major part of my ailments. When I address my stress. My lifestyle and eating habits,  life flows. 

17. I am a work in progress like everyone else and thats OK.  It's through my imperfections that I am able to assist . If I were perfect ( who friggen is ) then I would not be so driven to provide tools for others to cope with life as amazingly beautiful and difficult it can be. 

18. It's more than OK to express all parts of me. I have become increasing interested in the sacred feminine in particular Mary Magdeline. I feel she is guiding me and inspiring to work with feminine energy and nurture and support women . I have not expressed this openly to many but it's increasing becoming s part of me which I hope to explore further and will share more on.  

19. Most of my lessons have come through some intense self awareness and massive reality checks. If I had not stopped work and reached out to other professionals a couple of months ago (professionals like Dr Nima ( overview method) , naturopaths and of course Kinesiologist ), I would more than  likely have had destroyed my marriage, had a nervous breakdown as I spiraled deeper in adrenal fatigue as I was so deep into fight and flight the only thing I could think of doing was running . 

20. I am amazing as we all are!  💛

What I learn't in 40 years!

So I am turning 40 on the weekend and for the first time ever, I am so excited about reaching this milestone and an evening of celebration that has been planned for me to celebrate with my closest family and friends. This party was truly a lesson in letting go of controlling things (I am usually the event organiser in my family) and also for the first time I have allowed myself to deserve this. To deserve being the centre of attention. No a position I feel comfortable with admittedly but know this centres around feeling worthy enough and for the first time my entire life, I feel worthy enough and I too deserve to feel special.

And because I am really being spoilt by my gorgeous husband, I have time today to write a list of the top things I have learnt (Some the hard way) over the last 40 years. So here it goes;

 

1)      Love is really the answer – For many years fear has been the answer for me. I experienced fear in many aspects of my life and still working through many of them, however when I approach a situation for the vantage point of love, the answer always becomes clearer.

2)      You must love yourself. MUST.

3)      Gratitude really is the key to happiness. Being grateful for what you already have in your life, brings you more. Comparing, competing, focusing on the lack only gives you more heartache. I was not always the most grateful person but life has taught me the true meaning of gratitude and although these valuable lessons have come at a price, I am eternally grateful.

4)      I am enough- I learnt that I had to be enough for me. I looked for this feeling for many years in all the wrong spots. From my husband, family and friends, I realised that this is a lot of pressure and expectation to put on someone else. This feeling really had to come from within. I had to feel this for myself. Nobody could give this too me.

5)      There is a gift to be found in all situations. It may not be apparent immediately and it may take many years to reveal itself, but even in the most gut-wrenching, soul churning situations, there is a gift.

6)      You can’t have everyone you want in your life and that’s ok. We are not all meant to live and get along. I am a chronic holding on, loyal type person and truthfully I am always loyal to the point that I hurt myself but sometimes you just got to let go. Not everyone is meant to be in your life.

7)      Sometimes when you think you lost, you have actually won. One of the main mantras in my family growing up was ‘You can’t win!’ So I grew up believing this but as I got older and like to think wiser, I realised this mantra was quite limiting and you can in fact win. Win for you! You just need to follow your heart and trust and how many times did I fight to keep relationships and situations from going sour, to still have them go sour and find that it all actually worked out for the best.

8)      Your mind can be your best friend or your worst enemy. Wow have I learnt this the hard way. I always thought that my mind was the go to. The thoughts I thought were real and the stories and scenarios, I conjured up where real. Boy was I wrong. The day I realised (and again the hard way  ...  I am a bit thick) that a lot of my thoughts and beliefs where NOT mine and actually what I’d been told all my life by others was the most liberating REALISATION.

9)      What you want from your life, your dreams and goals and aspirations have to be yours. For many years I lived my life basing my decisions on what I thought other people wanted and expected. Funny thing was I honestly thought these thoughts were mine but again when I realised a lot of my decisions where to gain worthiness and that feeling of being enough (see number 3), things began to change

10)   Feelings are not a bad thing. How many times did I hear you are too sensitive? Or ‘your being stupid for feeling that way’. I have learnt to embrace these feelings and use them as my guidance system and at that point life became simpler.  If it makes me feel good I do it. If it doesn’t I don’t! Feelings really are our soul talking to us and not pushing them aside, acknowledging them can be crucial in trusting yourself.

11)   Really doesn’t not matter what others think. REALLY! Boy was this a Biggy for me. I always worried what others thought. My son that passed gave me this gift and his death taught me that you really need to honour you and your own family. Everything else secondary. We are different for a reason. We like, expect, think and believe in all different things and that’s OK. Living by the standards of others is one of the most soul crushing things you can do.

12)   Trust your intuition and inner guidance system. Only you know what is best for you. Not your husband, parents, kids, friends….YOU. Those that love you will enjoy seeing you happy and sometimes those that love you may not get it. You need to be OK with that and trust, trust, trust!

13)   Sometimes when you let go of control you may be pleasantly surprised. You are talking to control freak number 1 here. Well I have learned that sometimes surrendering the control and allowing others to freely express themselves may be exactly what you have been looking for and needing the whole time.

14)   Mothering is the most sacred privilege that I have been given. It really is an honour to carry and raise a child and my son taught me this. The still birth of my baby showed me the value of life and what a gift being a mother and carrying and raising a child really is. I also lost my best friend in the last decade to this very task of giving birth and from that moment on I never took being a mother, carrying and raising a child and one of the most sacred acts of giving birth for granted again. Thanks to these too beautiful souls, I was given this gift and sadly prior to that, I thought being a mum was a sacrifice. Boy was I wrong.

15)   Last but not least- LIFE IS A GIFT. Every day, every breath, every moment is to be cherished.

 

 There have been so many lessons and realisations in the last decade and being a work in progress, I am sure there will be many more and many that I will need to revisit but these are the top 15 (List started at top 10 and then I really could keep going). Thank you for allowing me to share.

Using Visualisation to free your self from Worry!

The mind is such a powerful tool but more often than not we use the power of the mind to our detriment rather than for our benefit . Our senses are the gateway into our inner world and what we allow through our senses will have an impact on our well being and our health .

The mind has no concept of what is real and what is imagined .So if we see something with our physical eyes that is traumatic, a threat or  stressful our body will respond engaging in the stress response or which is commonly know as fight or flight .  And if we consume our time worrying about stressful situations our body will respond the same way. It does this because our subconscious mind cannot determine whether the threat or stress is real or imagine . So the same bodily response , the same hormones and the same reactions are engaged as those that will engage, if we are in fact being chased by a lion through a jungle.

We are in a society that happily engages in hours of worry and stress , thinking about events that may happen. Worrying about what may be  or what may not be . What this person is thinking or what they may not be thinking. Negative thoughts running continuously on overdrive with absolutely no control. No harness on the ever running chatter of the mind. This is both an exhausting and debilitating activity. Thankfully this can be controlled!

How can I stop the worrying you ask ?

Before I answer that let me ask you a couple of other questions.

1) What do you gained from worrying ?
2) How many times have you spent hours worrying about something that has never eventuated

There is an old English proverb that states

'Worrying is like sitting  in a rocking chair.

It gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere'

And with that lies the answer to ' How do I  stop worrying' ?

The most effective way to stop the habit (and that is what it is ...a negative habit) of worrying is to replace the behaviour with something else . So the answer is to do something else . In fact the answer is to do the complete opposite . Use your imagination to create the outcome you want . As that is what worrying is . Your imagination running wild , unharnessed and uncontrolled and it is literally making you SICK.

 An effective tool I have used to replaced the habitual behaviour of worrying is to meditate . In particular Visualisation . A person that is a chronic worrier is able to visualise. This is something they do daily and picturing the worse scenario or outcome is something that they do quite well. So why not use this natural ability to work to your advantage.

Visualisation meditations is a powerful technique that is very effective in re programming the mind and replace the negatives thoughts and worry with positive imagery.

It has been proven to relieve pain , speed up the healing process and is very effective and used worldwide to relieve stress , anxiety and other forms of tension.

It is also an effective tool that may assist you to achieve goals and work towards desired out comes.

So the next time you start worrying , remember what this is doing to your health and well being and replace it with a positive imagery meditation or visualisation.  Meditations such as beach meditations can take you to a place of relaxation in seconds . Taking a few deep breaths as visualising yourself calm , centred and in control has the same effect on you body as if you where calm , centred and in control . Again meditating on the goals you wish to accomplish provides you with the mindset and motivation to work towards accomplishing those goals.

Below is an example of a beach Visualisation which is modified from www.innerhealthstudio.com. Why not give this a try when you mind starts going into worry mode? In fact it does not have to be this formal . Just picturing your self at the beach , hearing the sounds of the ocean , seeing the birds and waves rolling in , feeling the sun on your back , tasting the ocean salt in your mouth will have the same effect .

Beach visualisation

 

Get comfortable. Sit in a supportive chair or lie on your back.

Relax your body by releasing any areas of tension. Allow your arms to go limp... then your legs....

Feel your arms and legs becoming loose and relaxed...

Now relax your neck and back by relaxing your spine.... release the hold of your muscles all the way from your head, down your neck....along each vertebra to the tip of your spine...

Breathe deeply into your diaphragm, drawing air fully into your lungs.... and release the air with a whooshing sound....

Breathe in again, slowly.... pause for a moment.... and breathe out.....

Draw a deep breath in.... and out....

In..... out.....

Become more and more relaxed with each breath....

Feel your body giving up all the tension.... becoming relaxed.... and calm.... peaceful....

Feel a wave of relaxation flow from the soles of your feet, to your ankles, lower legs, hips, pelvic area, abdomen, chest, back, hands, lower arms, elbows, upper arms, shoulders, neck, back of your head, face, and the top of your head....

Allow your entire body to rest heavily on the surface where you sit or lie. Now that your body is fully relaxed, allow the visualization relaxation to begin.

Imagine you are walking toward the ocean.... walking through a beautiful, tropical forest....

You can hear the waves up ahead.... you can smell the ocean spray.... the air is moist and warm.... feel a pleasant, cool breeze blowing through the trees....

You walk along a path....coming closer to the sea....as you come to the edge of the trees, you see the brilliant aqua color of the ocean ahead....

You walk out of the forest and onto a long stretch of white sand.... the sand is very soft powder.... imagine taking off your shoes, and walking through the hot, white sand toward the water....

The beach is wide and long....

Hear the waves crashing to the shore....

Smell the clean salt water and beach....

You gaze again toward the water.... it is a bright blue-green....

See the waves washing up onto the sand..... and receding back toward the ocean.... washing up.... and flowing back down..... enjoy the ever-repeating rhythm of the waves...

Imagine yourself walking toward the water.... over the fine, hot sand.... you are feeling very hot....

As you approach the water, you can feel the mist from the ocean on your skin. You walk closer to the waves, and feel the sand becoming wet and firm....

A wave washes over the sand toward you.... and touches your toes before receding...

As you step forward, more waves wash over your feet... feel the cool water provide relief from the heat....

Walk further into the clear, clean water.... you can see the white sand under the water.... the water is a pleasant, relaxing temperature.... providing relief from the hot sun... cool but not cold....

You walk further into the water if you wish.... swim if you want to.... enjoy the ocean for a few minutes..... allow the visualization relaxation to deepen.... more and more relaxed... enjoy the ocean....

Now you are feeling calm and refreshed...

You walk back out of the water and onto the beach...

Stroll along the beach at the water's edge.... free of worries... no stress... calm..... enjoying this holiday....

Up ahead is a comfortable lounge chair and towel, just for you...

Sit or lie down in the chair, or spread the towel on the sand.... relax on the chair or towel.... enjoying the sun.... the breeze.... the waves.....

You feel peaceful and relaxed.... allow all your stresses to melt away....

When you are ready to return from your vacation, do so slowly....

 

Bring yourself back to your usual level of alertness and awareness....

Keep with you the feeling of calm and relaxation.... feeling ready to return to your day....

Open your eyes, stretch your muscles... and become fully alert... refreshed... and filled with energy.

 

 

 Radiant Healing

 

 

Why Meditate !

 So Many of you have shown an interest in Meditation but perhaps don't know too much about it . There is quite a buzz around about meditating at the moment. You hear that it is great for you but perhaps don't really understand why! I hope after reading this article you can begin to understand the importance of meditation for your personal well being . The effects of meditation are now being supported by science . So the notion that meditation is solely a spiritual/religious activity is incorrect . In fact the great thing about meditation is that your philosophy/religious belief is completely irrelevant .  Meditation can (and is ) practiced by people of different religions or no religion and these days it is being used more and more  as a natural therapy  that has many benefits to the Mind , body and spirit .

We are living in a day and age where stress and anxiety is on the rise . Demanding lifestyles, hectic schedules, an environment that is not so clean and the fact the technology has become so advance that we are contactable 24/7 by various means, is putting so much pressure on our minds ,bodies and our spiritual well being . More and more people are experiencing overwhelm , claim to have no time to look after themselves and in general loosing focus and direction with what it is they want from life . They have lost a connection . A connection between their soul and the divine . They no longer know who they are and what it is they stand for.

Meditation has so many benefits but its is best broken down into physical, psychological, lifestyle and spiritual benefits.

Physical Benefits of Meditation *

• Decrease metabolic rate and lowers heart rate
• Reduces stress hormones such as cortisol
• Reduces high blood pressure
• Has been found to help asthma patients
• Slows down ageing process of brain
• Slows down aging process

Psychological benefits of Meditation *

• Increased creativity and learning
• Changes the way the brain works
• helps to decrease anxiety , depression , irritability and moodiness
• improves memory
• increases feeling's of inner peace , happiness and contentment
• increase emotional stability

Lifestyle benefits of meditation

• Improved relationships
• Increased Job satisfaction
• help to manage weight

Spiritual Benefits of Meditation

• Feelings of connectedness
• Inner knowing
• In touch with your souls desires
• increased intuition
• general increase in calmness and ability to cope with life

Of course this is a brief summary of the benefits of meditation but it gives you a general idea of what you can hope to accomplish if you start to meditate . Even five minutes a day to start  ,will help you see a vast improvement in over all wellness.

Have I Encouraged you to want to know more ?

Perhaps it would help you to know how meditation has helped me!

Learning how to quieten my mind has had such a profound effect on my life . I was always a deep thinker and found it very hard to switch the chit chat off that was continuously going on in my mind . One of my life long friends who I love dearly used to say to me 'Rita you think way to much' ! That thinking kept me in my left side of my brain which is why in my early 20's , I pursued  a Finance degree and I worked in the corporate world for over 10 years for a demanding , deadline driven organisation . But the pressure of the corporate environment and just the day to day dramas of life led me into anxiety and overwhelm . I found it hard to switch off in the evening and it got to the point where I didn't know how to relax . So I had to re learn this . Life and the death of one of my closest friends got me searching for more and I signed up for a metaphysics certificate where I was introduced to meditation . Since then Meditation has become a big part of my life and I know have the skills to meditate for long periods of time but even for 5 minutes if I feel overwhelmed . Meditation has given me the tools to learn how to switch off the mind and relax . I no longer have trouble sleeping and when I feel anxious and in overwhelm all I need to do is check my breathe and switch my mind off even for 5 minutes and I feel better for it . It has made me an all round calmer person and allowed me to get in the moment where I could feel at peace .

Daily I will use mediation to calm my self in moments of anxiety or if I experience overwhelm . As a busy mum with two business's and a hectic lifestyle , this gives me the tools to stay calm , or calm my self when need be. These are VALUABLE life skill that anyone can learn and I promise if you get your self in a routine of meditating regularly it will change your life .

Stay tuned for for meditation tips but if you would like to know more about my meditation one to one coaching service where I can privately coach you and give you the tools to help you cope with the day to day stress called life ! Please call today or connect with me via my website . www.radianthealing @vpweb.com.au

Feel free to leave any questions here in the comments section and or on my facebook page x

In love and health
Rita - Radiant Healing 

*summaries take from 'Power Training and coaching institute training manual'

Check out Radiant Healings Web Page

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Healing the Emotions Associated with Past events/trauma .

Past experiences if not accepted as that but a memory with no emotional attachment can be stored in our body and manifest in the form of Dis-ease ! Knowing this we can all make a choice to begin to heal today . As today is tomorrows yesterday and we no longer want the pain and suffering of painful memories . Here are some tips that you can apply in your day to day life can may help with the emotions associated with the past .



Healing the Past Tip # 1 - Recognising and Replacing painful memories .
Recognising Past events/trauma which are holding you back and inhibiting you from living a happy healthy life is the first step in beginning to heal . Acknowledging the emotions and sitting with them although painful – is a way to bring forward into your conscious that which you have buried deep into your subconscious . It is a way of saying to yourself   ‘OK I know you are there and you have made me feel this way for way to long and but now its time to try something different because I deserve to be happy today ‘. Once we have acknowledge these thoughts it is time to replace them with new thoughts . To help you with this may I suggest the 'Serenity Prayer' . I have found this prayer extremely powerful. Try saying this every time a past/painful memory enters your mind . Sometimes we are so caught up in the past, our thoughts naturally go there almost like we have no control . Whilst there is emotion attached to it , they will continue to be painful. We want to begin to control our mind and dissolve these painful emotions by reigning in our thoughts ♥ .


Serenity Prayer

'Grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, The courage to change the things we can, And the wisdom to know the difference.'


Healing the past tip #2 - Acceptance

Acceptance does not mean that the memory does not exist - it will always exist , however when you have other memories from the past like 'who sat next to you in the 3rd grade' , you do not have any emotional attachment . So our aim is when we think of these events /people or memories of the past , We don’t have the emotion/ pain that goes with it . We do this via acceptance - accepting what is and what cannot be changed . We cannot change the past . Lets not be entrapped by it. You don’t deserve to have to relive these painful memories constantly - you deserve to be happy and at peace now and in the Future. ♥


Healing the Past Tip # 3 - Forgiveness

Tip # 3 for healing the past is forgiveness. Its about forgiving all involved not for them but for you and in most cases its about forgiving YOU !. Every happening is the way it was meant to happen. For whatever reason sometimes reasons we may never know , this event has happened . Forgiveness does not mean you have to have the person in your life that hurt you . Nor does it mean you condone their behaviour. It just cutting any emotional charge to the event and if you can as hard as it is finding it in your heart to wish them well and send them love ♥


Healing the Past tip # 4 – What have I learnt ?

Tip #4 healing the past - what did I learn ? It's all about perspective. Focusing solely on what happened keeps one foot firmly locked into the past . It helps to ask your self what did I learn from this experience? What did I gain. Did I learn something new about myself? Did I gain some wisdom for example not to trust a certain person or maybe that I do have support around me ! Did it awaken my life's purpose or did the experience help me grow ? Do I value my life , my children , my family even more ? For every negative it helps to see the positive. This helps balance out the emotions ♥



Healing the past tip # 5- Healing through meditation.

I have talked allot about focusing on what we have now . Letting go of that which we cannot change , accepting the past and living today in happiness . One way to get you in the moment is meditating . Through breathing and techniques which help you to control your thoughts , meditating can help you relax and release the toxic emotions of the past . You can find many free guided meditations on line that can help you work through these feelings or contact Radiant Healing for a private Meditation coaching session.



Tip #6 for healing the past – Taking responsibility for your role in past events

'The world changes when u do ' Robert Holden ♥ 

 This brings be to tip #6 taking responsibility / owner ship of the role YOU played in your past . Too often we are full of anger and resentment towards situations and people of or past when in all honestly and the bottom line truth is you need to own it . This may be hard to hear for some but we all played a part in our past and lovingly accepting your role is the most empowering thing you can do . You are not a victim ! You had a choice and I'm willing to bet you have learnt so much . ♥



Tip # 7 for healing the past –releasing the toxic emotion

The emotions attached to past events is what keeping us tied to the past. Corded to very people, situations and events that we are trying so desperately to let go of. Emotions such as anger, resentment, hate, guilt, shame etc. are actually toxic to our well being. As stated earlier these emotions when stored in our body lead to dis-ease or in common terms disease. Some people find this out too late and a lot of people realize this as a process of their healing and once these emotions are acknowledged and released begin to heal. Carrying these emotions with us on a day to day basis plays havoc with our body, organs, and functions not to mention our peace of mind. If this is not enough motivation to heal and release, I don’t know what is. Let it go ♥

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